MAMAGORI AS AN INSECT

Should there ever be an instance that this mammal of a kind, Mamagori, ever have to assume another identity as an insect, what would it be?

To my childhood friend, Index Number 24, the following are excerpts from my wandering thought processes. (If I appear incoherent, do not blame me but blame it on me watching Siti's 30-minute engagement and solemnisation, live over my grainy TV3 channel this morning. I still cannot get over the christening of her 'dulang hantarans' with titles from her hit songs. But I applaud her solemnisation dress which looks very much like my own wedding gown six years ago! Ah, good taste? Bad?)

Ok, if this gorrilla of a mother should ever be relegated to a cameo role in your soon-to-be, insect-themed story book, it must fulfill the following criteria.

1) It's got to be the biggest insect alive...I've done some research and the answer is...GOLIATH BEETLE; it is the heaviest by mass (3.5 ounces, 4.5 inches). Granted there would be some difficulty choosing this as THE insect, for the sheer fact, that it is not a household insect. Mind you, it's found somewhere in the Amazonian jungle. I also acknowledge the difficulty of finding its equivalent name in Malay; kumbang goliath? kumbang kembang? kumbang dinasour??

2) It's got to be the smartest insect...erm, now, this would be difficult considering insects are invertebraes, no spinal cords, no brains, not intelligent, full-stop.

3) Ok, ok, if we don't have a Malay name for the biggest insect or the cleverest one, how about changing me into the richest insect? Yes, I know I'm not rich in this life, but in this fantasy world, can I at least be one? How about the bee, with its honey of pure gold? Aisha Lebah?

4) Well, if there is no room for a wandering female queen bee, I don't mind being christened the great flying cockroach, Aisha Lipas Terbang. But on the drawing boards, could you at least give me a nice golden brown colour? Make me fly around and not zit across the gritty kitchen floor? Give me the best brains of the lot? And if I can't be the richest, then at least don't let my character be 'Bygoned' to death, ok?

All right dear friend, I look forward to your maiden attempt at writing Malay children's storybooks. A set of 3, you say? Reserve one for me.